On a networking site I belong to for moms I was recently intrigued by a poll that someone posted in a pregnancy forum. The poll asked if moms were planning on breastfeeding or formula feeding. Many of the votes (at least when I originally looked at it) were for breastfeeding. The additional comments had a number of responses saying how moms were going to try and see how it worked out.
I was kind of taken aback. I got the impression that many women, especially first time moms think that breastfeeding is a huge challenge and they get the impression that there is some reason they won't be successful. I really wanted to see if this impression was true so I added my own post to the forum asking moms what "try" meant to them. I straight up told them I was a breastfeeding advocate and for me, formula feeding is not an option. I asked them to what extent they would try and mentioned many possibilities such as lactation consultants, supply boosters, breastfeeding aids (nipple shield, SNS, etc.), support groups, etc. I asked what their breaking point was to where they would decide their trying wouldn't work and why they used the word "try" as though they had the impression there would be problems.
I got a pretty decent response from the moms, though many of them did not answer the questions specifically. There were several that seem to have the same impression that I do that if you say you are going to "try," it assumes that you anticipate problems and it allows a less successful nursing relationship that may turn to using formula instead. Many responded that to them there was no "try" they would or did do it and that their determination helped them. Much like me, it was an "I will" vs. "I'll try."
The vast majority of responses was exactly what I predicted, however. Many moms had previous experiences where they nursed and had challenges and eventually switched to formula feeding and therefore figured they would follow the same course with a new baby. I received many responses with varying degrees of hostility about how not everyone can breastfeed, there were too many complications, and how breastfeeding is "shoved down everyone's throat." Only a few moms discussed how the resources they used when difficulties presented themselves helped them overcome the hurdles and they had very successful nursing relationships with their babies. Another few mentioned how with previous pregnancies, they were uneducated and didn't know any better. This, I believe is at the heart of the matter.
Many of the moms that presented difficulties mentioned using some of the resources I mentioned in my original post that can help overcome hurdles of breastfeeding, but most didn't scratch the surface or go very far beyond one or two things to discover what was wrong and find a solution or management plan. Some list seeing several lactation consultants, but I wonder if they were looking for a quick fix or if they only sought help from a single consultant once (none that stopped breastfeeding said they saw consultants for multiple visits or long-term consultations - of course, they may have, I just don't know). One mom who ended up formula feeding said consultants didn't tell her anything she didn't already know, she didn't take a preparation class, and that she was too intelligent for support groups. She also didn't know what nipple shields or supplemental nursers were. Sorry, but I hardly think she knew everything she claimed to know - or at least enough to allow her to continue.
So, after all this, what do I figure out? My suspicions were true. So many breastfeeding relationships fail because of lack of education, support, and will. I beg every new mom that is looking forward to breastfeeding - especially if she's had trouble in the past or if this is her first child to educate herself and find local support. Breastfeeding rarely succeeds without it.
And one more thing I learned - many moms think that a low milk supply means the end of nursing. Not true! People talk about supplementing with formula when what they actually mean is formula feeding. Supplementing means "in addition to." Some low milk supply issues can only be helped so much - that is true. That doesn't mean that nursing has to be given up completely. Nursing and supplementing can work together and the baby will benefit from any amount of breast milk that he or she gets.
So, for those that are looking to breastfeed for the first time or looking for a better experience than before, please consider the following:
Breastfeeding Classes: Classes are available through community centers, hospitals, birthing centers, and many other places to help you get prepared. They will teach you about how to hold the baby, how to get a proper latch (when the baby attaches to the breast), how milk production works, how to maintain appropriate levels of milk production (supply and demand), what is an appropriate amount for a newborn and how to tell if your baby is getting enough, what are some common challenges and how to overcome them, and many other things. I came from a very strong breastfeeding background and I still learned an astounding amount of information from my class.
Breastfeeding Aids: Many breastfeeding aids are available. They come in the form of nipple shields (for nursing with painful nipples or inverted nipples), herbal supplements or prescriptions for boosting milk supply (if this is an issues), creams and pad for sore nipples, breast pumps and accessories, breastfeeding pillows, nursing covers, supplemental nursing systems, and many many more. Some of these are discussed in breast feeding classes, others you can learn about from consultants or support groups - not to mention where to get them. There are many things that can help breast feeding go smoother or assist you when you meet challenges.
Lactation Consultants: Lactation consultants are invaluable. They can help you on a one-on-one basis to make sure you have a good latch, they can help monitor intake, offer solutions to problems, identify the source of problems you may encounter. It is very common for moms that had c-sections or premature babies to experience challenges to breastfeeding especially in the early stages and consultants can help to turn around some of the negative breastfeeding related effects of the birth and early days and assist moms in having a very successful nursing relationship with their baby. Consultants come in many forms with varying degrees of education. For common problems, a Community Breastfeeding Educator (CBE) or La Leche League Leader (LLL Leader) can be a wonderful asset. For more challenging issues, a Certified Lactation Consultant (CLC), Licensed Lactation Consultant (LLC), or International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) can help. Seek out local consultants so you know where one is in your area and consider a prenatal consultation.
Support Groups: Support groups are not just for the down and broken. With so many challenges and perceived challenges to breastfeeding support groups are wonderful. They provide a low pressure environment to discuss anything you have questions about. Many of the moms may have experienced something similar and can tell you what worked for them. You may also learn about breastfeeding challenges you never knew were a possibility and how they can be overcome. You also are more likely to learn to more confidently nurse in public and learn some tricks to doing so discreetly. By being surrounded by other nursing moms, you are more likely to succeed with your breastfeeding goals. Support groups are available at community centers, hospitals, churches, shops, through La Leche League (which also offers educational discussions), and many other places. Consider finding a group and joining before the baby is born for an eye-opening and educational experience.
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