In a group forum post that I read recently, in a mom group, one mom was asking for suggestions on juggling two kids. There were several suggestions here and there but one really caught my attention. To be perfectly honest, this is the only suggestion that I actually remember. The reason this one caught my attention was because it was so blatantly against all of my mothering instincts. This is especially interesting considering that before I ever had kids I probably wouldn't have blinked twice at the suggestion.
The inquiry regarded what to do when you have a young crying infant that needs to be tended to and also a toddler that needs attention. The response that caught my attention was as follows, "Let the baby cry and tend to the toddler. The baby won't remember." Now, I may not have quoted that verbatim; however, that was essentially what this suggestion was saying. On the surface, I suppose that this seems to makes sense. There are so many different things that can go on with babies however, and there really is a better alternative.
If you've read my earlier post on Cry It Out, you may already know my position. I have read and believe that leaving a baby to cry can lead to some damage that may affect their life as they continue to grow into a child, teenager, and adult. This damage is and sort of chemical damage caused by the release of excess cortisol as the baby cries and continues to become more and more stressed. The release of cortisol is a human (and animal) stress response. Babies left to cry have been proven to mature into children and adults who do not trust others because when they were a baby they were basically left to cry and fuss and their needs were never (rarely, or only intermittently) met by their caretaker. Many people only talk about crying it out when discussing sleep training, ways to get a child to go to sleep independently. Probably less commonly discussed is the topic we're talking about now, what happens when a baby is crying and has needs but an older sibling needs attention as well in a situation completely unrelated to sleep.
The fact of the matter is, babies cry because they have a need that needs to be met. They're virtually incapable of seeking attention alone (not to be confused with the need for comfort). They merely have a need and have only one way in which to communicate with their caretaker. The biggest problem in this situation is that, contrary to popular American beliefs, babies shouldn't cry that much. Babies thrive when they're kept close to their caretaker, i.e. their mother, and their needs are met as they occur. Having a toddler around certainly does throw you for a loop as to how you're supposed to be able to readily tend to the baby's needs while still handling your toddler.
My solution? Simple. Wear your baby.
The benefits of baby-wearing are astounding. I've discussed many of them in my baby-wearing post. When you also have an older toddler, in my book, baby-wearing is essential. By simply wearing the baby he or she is kept close, and that takes care of a number of needs that the baby may have right away. You're right there in contact with the baby, and are likely to easily recognize a dirty or wet diaper. The baby is kept warm and comforted by being right next to mama. For many baby-wearers nursing can also be taken care of completely hands-free (with the exception of adjusting position). Here's the kicker, baby wearing leaves you hands free to do any number of tasks. In this situation, it allows you to tend to your toddler. There's no need to leave the baby to cry to check on your toddler. The baby is right there with you, you're hands free and can turn your attention to your older child. It's win-win. Your baby gets the close personal attention he or she needs, and your toddler has their needs addressed as well. Not to mention that by having the baby right there next to you, the frequency of having a crying, fussy baby in general is decreased.
Check out my baby-wearing post for more information on the benefits of baby-wearing as well as a description of some different carriers that are available. Happy baby-wearing!
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
On Writing a Birth Plan
When I was pregnant with my first, I had an idea of what I wanted and though I had heard of writing a birth plan, I didn't think it was necessary because I knew what I wanted. It turns out I didn't get what I wanted. I'm not sure if that was actually related to not having a written birth plan, but I figured writing it down the second time around was something I wanted to do. After the birth of my first son, I felt I had a pretty good experience, however, I still wanted things a bit different. First, I didn't want medical augmentation of the labor. I really felt I fell victim to a snowball effect and that one intervention lead to another. I wanted the second time around to be different.
I did more research and reading on natural childbirth, focusing most of my time reading "HypnoBirthing" and learning relaxation techniques. The book also covers a decent amount about writing up your "birth preferences," known colloquially as a birth plan. The book offered several suggestions that I found useful and I incorporated some things into my birth plan that I had not even known about prior to reading the book.
I did run into a snag though. When I actually went to put on paper what I wanted, I was a bit unsure of what to add. Sure, there were a few things I knew I wanted, no drugs, rooming in with the baby, etc. There were a few things that I learned about in the book like the benefits of letting the umbilical cord finish pulsing prior to clamping and cutting it. But what I was still confused about was how to write it all up and how to phrase my birth plan. I turned to the internet as we do for many things and tried to look for some templates and while I found some things here and there or forms specific to breastfeeding after the birth, I didn't really find what I was looking for and I couldn't even find much in the way of other birth plans that people had written up (I think I found one). I felt a bit on my own, but taking from the form I found, the book, and the one birth plan I had found online and a few other things here and there, I came up with what I wanted. In discussing with an expectant mom today about labor plans and expectations we came across a few things that she hadn't thought of that she may have wanted to include in her birth plan. I am adding mine below so that perhaps another expectant mom can find some use for it and maybe having one more available online will help other moms to put together their own and possibly identify some things that she may have not thought about previously.
One thing I found disappointing, sort of after the fact, was that one of the nursery nurses mentioned that when they see that a mom has a birth plan, they worry. She said that a birth plan usually means a c-section. I'm not sure why this phenomenon is the case, but in my situation, I got what I wanted. I firmly believe that most moms can get what they want, but having a supportive nurse and staff when in labor is a good way to go about getting what you want. I added that to my birth plan too.
In any case, here is the list of my "birth preferences" for my second son:
I did more research and reading on natural childbirth, focusing most of my time reading "HypnoBirthing" and learning relaxation techniques. The book also covers a decent amount about writing up your "birth preferences," known colloquially as a birth plan. The book offered several suggestions that I found useful and I incorporated some things into my birth plan that I had not even known about prior to reading the book.
I did run into a snag though. When I actually went to put on paper what I wanted, I was a bit unsure of what to add. Sure, there were a few things I knew I wanted, no drugs, rooming in with the baby, etc. There were a few things that I learned about in the book like the benefits of letting the umbilical cord finish pulsing prior to clamping and cutting it. But what I was still confused about was how to write it all up and how to phrase my birth plan. I turned to the internet as we do for many things and tried to look for some templates and while I found some things here and there or forms specific to breastfeeding after the birth, I didn't really find what I was looking for and I couldn't even find much in the way of other birth plans that people had written up (I think I found one). I felt a bit on my own, but taking from the form I found, the book, and the one birth plan I had found online and a few other things here and there, I came up with what I wanted. In discussing with an expectant mom today about labor plans and expectations we came across a few things that she hadn't thought of that she may have wanted to include in her birth plan. I am adding mine below so that perhaps another expectant mom can find some use for it and maybe having one more available online will help other moms to put together their own and possibly identify some things that she may have not thought about previously.
One thing I found disappointing, sort of after the fact, was that one of the nursery nurses mentioned that when they see that a mom has a birth plan, they worry. She said that a birth plan usually means a c-section. I'm not sure why this phenomenon is the case, but in my situation, I got what I wanted. I firmly believe that most moms can get what they want, but having a supportive nurse and staff when in labor is a good way to go about getting what you want. I added that to my birth plan too.
In any case, here is the list of my "birth preferences" for my second son:
Birth Preferences for B. E. (April/May 2011)
Howdy! Thank you for being a part of my birthing experience to welcome my newest little one into the world. I am looking forward to a natural birth with limited to no medical intervention, therefore, if there is a nurse who is partial to natural birth, I would enjoy working with him or her. I have listed several items which are important to me for my baby's birth and I greatly appreciate your cooperation in these matters.
Fluids – I prefer only a heparin block.
I am well aware of the importance of hydration during labor as well as the advantages of having a vein readily accessible should medication need to be administered. I am not anticipating needing medication and I would like the freedom to move around while I labor, therefore, I appreciate being free of a fluid pump and line.
Monitoring – I prefer intermittent monitoring if at all possible.
As mentioned above, because I would like freedom of movement during my labor, I prefer intermittent fetal monitoring if it is available. I am happy to comply with hospital regulations for minimum monitoring times and appreciate the opportunity to have the freedom to move around and change positions at will.
Environment – I would like a calm, quiet, dim environment to labor and birth in.
I understand that nurses and doctors are an integral part in ensuring the safety and health of me and my baby. I believe that a calm, quiet, minimally interrupted environment is also an integral part in ensuring the healthy natural progression of my labor. Therefore, please limit monitoring, checks, and traffic to the minimum. Should visitors arrive, please consult me or my husband before directing them to our room. Please limit lighting if at all possible during the birth as well, so my baby can be born into a welcoming environment.
Pain medication – I would like to avoid medications which can lessen the experience for me and my baby.
I am well aware of the systemic and anesthetic medications that are available to me for labor. I do not wish to be offered any medications. Please do not ask me to rate my pain level as I will respectfully decline to answer. If I feel medication is necessary, I or my husband will request it.
Assistance with labor progression – I do not wish to receive artificial forms of labor assistance.
If for some reason my labor stalls or slows for an unreasonable amount of time, as some pauses are the body's natural way of resting, I would like to try natural ways of helping the labor to progress. I would like to discuss any artificial interventions with my doctor and be allowed adequate time to discuss and decide on a course of action prior to proceeding.
Episiotomy – I do not wish to receive an episiotomy.
My doctor has let me know that this procedure is not typically performed in most cases, however, I want to express my preference again. I prefer a tear to an episiotomy.
After the birth
– I would like to have my baby placed on my stomach or chest immediately following the birth.
- Please allow the cord to stop pulsing before cutting it.
- Please perform initial evaluations, suctioning, only necessary cleaning, etc. with the baby on my chest. Please check weight and other measurements as quickly as possible and return the baby to me.
- I would like to initiate breastfeeding as soon as the baby is ready after birth and holding him skin-to-skin is the best way for me to know when he is ready.
Placenta – I would like to deliver the placenta naturally if possible.
I plan to donate my placenta and have discussed it with my doctor. Because of this, I would like the placenta to be free from damage of artificial delivery if avoidable. All portions of the umbilical cord that are separated from the baby will also be donated with the placenta. Please wrap the placenta and all portions of the detached umbilical cord in a biohazard bag and place it in the freezer bag and cooler I will provide.
Recovery
- I wish the baby to room in with me and only be removed or taken to the nursery for procedures that absolutely can not be performed in my room.
- For the short time(s) that my baby must be separated from me, do not offer him any pacifiers, bottles, or formula as he will be learning to breastfeed.
- I am expecting a boy and will have him circumcised. Again, I do not wish for him to be given a pacifier. Please use a finger or other way to administer the glucose water during the procedure.
- Please allow the room lights to remain dim for any procedures or checks of me or the baby as I would like him to be comfortable.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
On Breastfeeding Awareness - The Big Latch On
So today was no ordinary Saturday. Ok, it was a little. Rather than head to our favorite mommy/baby consignment shop for our normal Saturday meeting, we headed there for this year's Big Latch On. The Big Latch On is an event sponsored by Le Leche League to organize record numbers of moms all around the country to breastfeed simultaneously to raise awareness of , well, breastfeeding. While not reaching out for the Guinness record, the aim is to collect as many moms as possible to participate. It just turned out convenient for me since I was going there anyway, but I probably would have attended at another time and place if that's where it was being organized since I tend toward "lactivist" habits and beliefs.
Our little gathering wasn't impressive by any means, but that's ok. We had 15 moms in attendance. The oldest nursling there was about 20 months. I'm not sure how young the youngest was. It still turned out to be a nice little gathering. We even had a reporter from a local newspaper to come and take a pictures of all the participants (while not necessarily in the act, but that's ok).
This event was a great little one for me to participate in. I'm not they type to crave the attention of other "lactivist" activities that may be louder or draw more attention from on-lookers (ok, maybe, but it really does depend on the situation).
Our little gathering wasn't impressive by any means, but that's ok. We had 15 moms in attendance. The oldest nursling there was about 20 months. I'm not sure how young the youngest was. It still turned out to be a nice little gathering. We even had a reporter from a local newspaper to come and take a pictures of all the participants (while not necessarily in the act, but that's ok).
This event was a great little one for me to participate in. I'm not they type to crave the attention of other "lactivist" activities that may be louder or draw more attention from on-lookers (ok, maybe, but it really does depend on the situation).
Monday, August 1, 2011
On Co-sleeping, Bed-sharing, and Infant Death
We need some education. That's right, education. It hits the news all the time when a baby passes away in the night. SIDS is mentioned, sleeping in an adult bed is mentioned, etc. It all gets garbled and confused and we are hit with absolutes about sleeping babies. Don't sleep with the baby, never put the baby in an adult bed, etc, etc, etc.
Ok, well, here's the thing, these news reports or stories do a little bit of reporting on the incident and then jumble up all kinds of facts and if you aren't clear on the details, they'd have you believe that SIDS is caused by a family bed. All these things are mentioned in these reports but typically, they forget to differentiate. I want to lay the record straight. No matter how you choose to arrange bed time for you and the baby is your decision, but understand the differences in what they are talking about.
Let's talk SIDS. SIDS stands for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. What makes it scary is that no one knows the cause. Babies simply pass away in their sleep. Many news reports that talk about babies dying in their sleep mention SIDS, but then go on to talk about how the baby suffocated while sleeping with his or her mother. Well, that cause of death was not SIDS, it was suffocation. Why was SIDS even brought up? Who knows, but they bring it up anyway. If a child truly died of SIDS, it almost assuredly was not sleeping with it's parent(s) - that's not a guarantee, it's just not likely. There are many things that can be done that are suggested to decrease the risk of SIDS such as having a fan on, giving the baby a pacifier when going to sleep, having the baby sleep in the same room with the parents, breastfeeding, lay the baby on his or her back to sleep, etc. Other safe sleeping practices have nothing to do with SIDS and more to do with preventing suffocation such as making sure the crib sheet is tightly fitted to the mattress, keep blankets and stuffed animals out of the crib, etc.
And speaking of suffocation, that is most commonly the cause of death when a death is reported when the baby was sleeping with the parent. You hear many things like the baby rolled into the soft mattress or that the baby suffocated in the pillows. Alternately, you hear the tale of the baby being suffocated while the parent and baby were napping on the couch. Well, yeah, of course that is what you hear - those are all considered unsafe sleeping practices even among the people that encourage sleeping with the baby. Now, I'm not trying to make light of the situation, obviously it's a tragedy and no one wishes that upon any parent. The problem is that most of the news reports make too many generalizations and tend to confuse people and then just make people believe that if your baby sleeps with you, you will suffocate it. Co-sleeping becomes a dirty word. Which is odd considering it's actually encouraged by the AAP.
What? It's encouraged? I must be crazy to say that. Nope, I'm not. The reason it doesn't sound right is because there is a distinction between co-sleeping and bed-sharing that people don't always recognize. Co-sleeping means parents sleeping with the baby in the same room - not necessarily in the same bed. The AAP recommends that babies sleep in the parent's room on a separate surface. The "in the same room" part helps reduce the risk of SIDS since it is believed that the parents breathing patterns help to regulate the breathing of a sleeping baby. The "on a separate surface" part is to reduce the risk of suffocation. Most people that are afraid to sleep in the same bed with a baby are afraid to do so because of suffocation. Many people that do sleep with the baby in the same bed (or unfortunately couch) do not understand the safety measures that need to be taken before setting up this sort of arrangement. So, despite what the news says, co-sleeping is good and encouraged.
Bed-sharing however, is typically looked down upon or at the very least, discouraged. Bed-sharing is a type of co-sleeping, but co-sleeping does not necessarily mean bed-sharing. Bed-sharing has a long history, most notably in tribal communities where mother and baby sleep side by side - not necessarily on a bed though, typically on the ground. Studies have actually been done with mothers and babies sleeping side by side where if there is a change in the baby's breathing, the mother will, in her sleep, nestle the baby closer to her. It is believed that is action will kick-start the baby's regular breathing pattern because they are once again closer to their mother who has a regular breathing pattern. It's just my two cents, but physiologically speaking, presence of carbon dioxide in the lungs is what makes us breathe, not lack of oxygen, so it would make sense that the mother exhaling carbon dioxide near the baby's face would cause inhalation - that's just my personal conclusion - that this has something to do with reduction of SIDS risk along with close proximity of the mom helping to regulate heart rate and breathing. In any case, bed-sharing isn't inherently dangerous, but the blanket discouragement of it is due to lack of appropriate safety measures in place. Safe bed-sharing means that the baby is not near pillows or blankets, the bed is a firm surface (sorry to those of you who like your pillow-top mattresses), the baby sleeps next to the mother only - not another adult (or especially another child) because only the mother is biologically "programmed" to have an altered sleep pattern/habit because of a present baby, neither parent should be under the influence of drugs or alcohol, the parents should not be over-tired, etc. Another point that is not often discussed: breastfeeding is a pre-requisite. Yes, that's right, if you don't breastfeed, the baby shouldn't be sleeping in the bed with you. One reason that was suggested by one expert was because positionally, a breastfeeding baby is safer since they typically sleep lower next to the mother where her arm will typically block upward movement of the baby towards the pillow.
Either way, no matter what you choose for your family, make sure you are educated. SIDS is not suffocation. SIDS is deemed the cause of death when they have eliminated all other causes. Co-sleeping does not always mean bed-sharing - though the news reports would have you believe so. The media jumbles it all up and confuses and scares us (unless you pay close attention to the subtleties of their reporting). This is why we need to be educated.
Ok, well, here's the thing, these news reports or stories do a little bit of reporting on the incident and then jumble up all kinds of facts and if you aren't clear on the details, they'd have you believe that SIDS is caused by a family bed. All these things are mentioned in these reports but typically, they forget to differentiate. I want to lay the record straight. No matter how you choose to arrange bed time for you and the baby is your decision, but understand the differences in what they are talking about.
Let's talk SIDS. SIDS stands for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. What makes it scary is that no one knows the cause. Babies simply pass away in their sleep. Many news reports that talk about babies dying in their sleep mention SIDS, but then go on to talk about how the baby suffocated while sleeping with his or her mother. Well, that cause of death was not SIDS, it was suffocation. Why was SIDS even brought up? Who knows, but they bring it up anyway. If a child truly died of SIDS, it almost assuredly was not sleeping with it's parent(s) - that's not a guarantee, it's just not likely. There are many things that can be done that are suggested to decrease the risk of SIDS such as having a fan on, giving the baby a pacifier when going to sleep, having the baby sleep in the same room with the parents, breastfeeding, lay the baby on his or her back to sleep, etc. Other safe sleeping practices have nothing to do with SIDS and more to do with preventing suffocation such as making sure the crib sheet is tightly fitted to the mattress, keep blankets and stuffed animals out of the crib, etc.
And speaking of suffocation, that is most commonly the cause of death when a death is reported when the baby was sleeping with the parent. You hear many things like the baby rolled into the soft mattress or that the baby suffocated in the pillows. Alternately, you hear the tale of the baby being suffocated while the parent and baby were napping on the couch. Well, yeah, of course that is what you hear - those are all considered unsafe sleeping practices even among the people that encourage sleeping with the baby. Now, I'm not trying to make light of the situation, obviously it's a tragedy and no one wishes that upon any parent. The problem is that most of the news reports make too many generalizations and tend to confuse people and then just make people believe that if your baby sleeps with you, you will suffocate it. Co-sleeping becomes a dirty word. Which is odd considering it's actually encouraged by the AAP.
What? It's encouraged? I must be crazy to say that. Nope, I'm not. The reason it doesn't sound right is because there is a distinction between co-sleeping and bed-sharing that people don't always recognize. Co-sleeping means parents sleeping with the baby in the same room - not necessarily in the same bed. The AAP recommends that babies sleep in the parent's room on a separate surface. The "in the same room" part helps reduce the risk of SIDS since it is believed that the parents breathing patterns help to regulate the breathing of a sleeping baby. The "on a separate surface" part is to reduce the risk of suffocation. Most people that are afraid to sleep in the same bed with a baby are afraid to do so because of suffocation. Many people that do sleep with the baby in the same bed (or unfortunately couch) do not understand the safety measures that need to be taken before setting up this sort of arrangement. So, despite what the news says, co-sleeping is good and encouraged.
Bed-sharing however, is typically looked down upon or at the very least, discouraged. Bed-sharing is a type of co-sleeping, but co-sleeping does not necessarily mean bed-sharing. Bed-sharing has a long history, most notably in tribal communities where mother and baby sleep side by side - not necessarily on a bed though, typically on the ground. Studies have actually been done with mothers and babies sleeping side by side where if there is a change in the baby's breathing, the mother will, in her sleep, nestle the baby closer to her. It is believed that is action will kick-start the baby's regular breathing pattern because they are once again closer to their mother who has a regular breathing pattern. It's just my two cents, but physiologically speaking, presence of carbon dioxide in the lungs is what makes us breathe, not lack of oxygen, so it would make sense that the mother exhaling carbon dioxide near the baby's face would cause inhalation - that's just my personal conclusion - that this has something to do with reduction of SIDS risk along with close proximity of the mom helping to regulate heart rate and breathing. In any case, bed-sharing isn't inherently dangerous, but the blanket discouragement of it is due to lack of appropriate safety measures in place. Safe bed-sharing means that the baby is not near pillows or blankets, the bed is a firm surface (sorry to those of you who like your pillow-top mattresses), the baby sleeps next to the mother only - not another adult (or especially another child) because only the mother is biologically "programmed" to have an altered sleep pattern/habit because of a present baby, neither parent should be under the influence of drugs or alcohol, the parents should not be over-tired, etc. Another point that is not often discussed: breastfeeding is a pre-requisite. Yes, that's right, if you don't breastfeed, the baby shouldn't be sleeping in the bed with you. One reason that was suggested by one expert was because positionally, a breastfeeding baby is safer since they typically sleep lower next to the mother where her arm will typically block upward movement of the baby towards the pillow.
Either way, no matter what you choose for your family, make sure you are educated. SIDS is not suffocation. SIDS is deemed the cause of death when they have eliminated all other causes. Co-sleeping does not always mean bed-sharing - though the news reports would have you believe so. The media jumbles it all up and confuses and scares us (unless you pay close attention to the subtleties of their reporting). This is why we need to be educated.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
On Second Birthdays
Copied from my other blog because it fits here too:
Ok, so I should have put up this post several days ago, but what can I say, I didn't think about it. Or I'm lazy. Or I was too busy. Or whatever other excuse you can come up with can be filled in. I didn't do it on time. Deal. =)
So, yeah, this passed Sunday, my baby boy became a boy. He turned two. I dunno. Two years in my mind are really the baby years. They change so much from month to month that I can't stop thinking of him as a baby at the age of one. I look at him now though and he really is a boy. He runs, plays, climbs, and throws tantrums. Yeah, he's two.
It's been amazing lately seeing all he can do and all he does. He's starting to put more and more words together which sometimes is adorable (like the other day when he was saying goodbye to the baby, the dog, and the books) and sometimes is not so cute (like when he's whining about something). It is exciting to see the development and depressing because he is getting more independent. At least when he's happy. If he's cranky or upset, that's when he wants his mommy. And some of those times I want to bang my head into a wall because as much as I want to snuggle my son, I don't want him to think crying is an appropriate response (like when the doctor comes into the exam room).
I'm not really ready for him not to be a baby anymore. I don't know if I ever will be. Even with currently have another baby, I'm not ready for my oldest to no longer be one. Being a mom makes you funny in the head that way.
Ok, so I should have put up this post several days ago, but what can I say, I didn't think about it. Or I'm lazy. Or I was too busy. Or whatever other excuse you can come up with can be filled in. I didn't do it on time. Deal. =)
So, yeah, this passed Sunday, my baby boy became a boy. He turned two. I dunno. Two years in my mind are really the baby years. They change so much from month to month that I can't stop thinking of him as a baby at the age of one. I look at him now though and he really is a boy. He runs, plays, climbs, and throws tantrums. Yeah, he's two.
It's been amazing lately seeing all he can do and all he does. He's starting to put more and more words together which sometimes is adorable (like the other day when he was saying goodbye to the baby, the dog, and the books) and sometimes is not so cute (like when he's whining about something). It is exciting to see the development and depressing because he is getting more independent. At least when he's happy. If he's cranky or upset, that's when he wants his mommy. And some of those times I want to bang my head into a wall because as much as I want to snuggle my son, I don't want him to think crying is an appropriate response (like when the doctor comes into the exam room).
I'm not really ready for him not to be a baby anymore. I don't know if I ever will be. Even with currently have another baby, I'm not ready for my oldest to no longer be one. Being a mom makes you funny in the head that way.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
On Milk Donation
I donated my placenta, why not my milk? Ok, seriously though, I really wish this is something that had occurred to me when I had my first son. I really had no reason not to...
If you are not familiar with milk donation, I'll give a brief overview. There are several milk banks throughout the country, though there aren't even enough to have one per state. There are 12 milk banks that are members of HMBANA, or Human Milk Banking Association of North America. One of those banks is in Canada, the rest in the US. Milk banks work kinda like blood banks. They accept breast milk, pasteurize and test it, and then it gets packaged and stored where it is prescribed to babies in need. The babies that get preference are premature and ill babies primarily those in the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit). A prescription can be obtained for babies from pediatricians, however, this is not easy or cheap since there is such a high demand. Even though the American Academy of Pediatrics says that breast milk from another mother (if the mom can't nurse or pump her own milk for her baby) is a better feeding/nutrition option for babies than formula, most women are unable to obtain donated milk because there is such a low supply and a very high demand. The rate of preterm births is rising, but the number of donors is not, so the demand is even higher.
Milk donation is nothing new to me. Well, new for me actually doing it, but the concept is not new. I've known since I was a kid that my mom donated breast milk. Way back 35 years ago or so, my mom was asked to donate milk. She expressed and donated when two of my older sisters were babies (at separate times, they aren't twins). Back then, she said it worked kinda opposite of what we think of the milk man doing. In her case, they picked up the full bottles and dropped off the empty ones. My mom actually hand expressed her milk, something I can't imagine doing and I'm glad I don't have to, but apparently back then, hand expressing was much more efficient that using her manual pump that had a very small collection chamber.
In looking at the nursing relationship I had with my first son, I realized that I might have had some oversupply. He spit up copious amounts (which I'm sure you've read about if you've been following my blog) but still managed to be growing at the top of the charts. I also was able to pump a decent amount in one sitting and didn't realize until much later that most people typically pump less than I had been yielding. I decided that next time around, I would look into donating since as long as you keep pumping, your body will make more milk. It's just a matter of maximizing production.
When I got pregnant with my second, I started looking up information on donating milk and contacted the closest milk bank to me to find out what I would need to do. I had to wait until the baby was born - they wanted to make sure a good breastfeeding relationship had been established. After that point, I was able to start the screening process.
I was telling a friend the other day that I can understand to a certain extent why there aren't a ton of people that donate. It can be difficult. There are strict habits that need to be maintained. Not only do you have to pass the screening process (phone interview and questionnaire packet complete with forms to be signed by your OB as well as the baby's pediatrician) and blood work (which thankfully, they pay for); but you also have to adhere to strict rules about certain foods (or food components) to avoid - like large amounts of caffeine - medications or herbs you need to avoid (which is basically all of them with the exception of multi-vitamins or prenatals), and practices with how exactly you need to pump,what containers to use, and how to maintain your pump parts and collection bottles. It's a lot to remember and takes dedication. I still think it's worth it.
For the milk bank I'm working with, the initial donation is 100 oz. which is just under a gallon. After your initial donation, you can donate as much and as often as you like before your baby is a year old. Because the milk is primarily given to babies in the NICU, the nutritional components of your milk have to be closer to what a young baby would need and since it changes as your baby grows, the nutritional composition of milk for a nursing toddler is completely different than that of an infant, so there is a cut off point.
While I was waiting for all my paperwork to clear so I could pick up bottles to use for collection, I actually started donating to a local mom that I know that was having supply issues. Practices like this are normally not recommended since when you "casually share" there is no health screenings and it is unknown what you could be passing along. Typically if you know and trust the donor, however, there is the potential of less risk. In any case, it was nice to be able to help that mom out as well as work on increasing my supply since I was planning on donating anyway. I've recently had my blood drawn and I am waiting for the ok to drop off the milk I've collected up to this point. I actually ran out of bottles because I no longer was pumping for the mom I know (she was able to get her supply back up - yay!) so I ended up filling up the bottles faster than I anticipated.
I really do strongly urge any nursing mom who has a well established supply to look into donating. There is such a high demand and since you will make more milk to meet the demand, you won't be starving your baby, you'll just be making extra. It may be a bit of a pain or inconvenience, but it is so needed. More babies can be helped and if there are enough people that are willing to donate, the likelihood of babies being helped beyond the NICU is higher. I think all babies should benefit from breast milk and if for whatever reason they can't get it from their mom, it should be easier to get it from the milk bank than it currently is. The only way for that to happen is to have more women take the time to donate. Here is the link to HMBANA to find the milk bank closest to you and see what you can do to help: http://www.hmbana.org/
If you are not familiar with milk donation, I'll give a brief overview. There are several milk banks throughout the country, though there aren't even enough to have one per state. There are 12 milk banks that are members of HMBANA, or Human Milk Banking Association of North America. One of those banks is in Canada, the rest in the US. Milk banks work kinda like blood banks. They accept breast milk, pasteurize and test it, and then it gets packaged and stored where it is prescribed to babies in need. The babies that get preference are premature and ill babies primarily those in the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit). A prescription can be obtained for babies from pediatricians, however, this is not easy or cheap since there is such a high demand. Even though the American Academy of Pediatrics says that breast milk from another mother (if the mom can't nurse or pump her own milk for her baby) is a better feeding/nutrition option for babies than formula, most women are unable to obtain donated milk because there is such a low supply and a very high demand. The rate of preterm births is rising, but the number of donors is not, so the demand is even higher.
Milk donation is nothing new to me. Well, new for me actually doing it, but the concept is not new. I've known since I was a kid that my mom donated breast milk. Way back 35 years ago or so, my mom was asked to donate milk. She expressed and donated when two of my older sisters were babies (at separate times, they aren't twins). Back then, she said it worked kinda opposite of what we think of the milk man doing. In her case, they picked up the full bottles and dropped off the empty ones. My mom actually hand expressed her milk, something I can't imagine doing and I'm glad I don't have to, but apparently back then, hand expressing was much more efficient that using her manual pump that had a very small collection chamber.
In looking at the nursing relationship I had with my first son, I realized that I might have had some oversupply. He spit up copious amounts (which I'm sure you've read about if you've been following my blog) but still managed to be growing at the top of the charts. I also was able to pump a decent amount in one sitting and didn't realize until much later that most people typically pump less than I had been yielding. I decided that next time around, I would look into donating since as long as you keep pumping, your body will make more milk. It's just a matter of maximizing production.
When I got pregnant with my second, I started looking up information on donating milk and contacted the closest milk bank to me to find out what I would need to do. I had to wait until the baby was born - they wanted to make sure a good breastfeeding relationship had been established. After that point, I was able to start the screening process.
I was telling a friend the other day that I can understand to a certain extent why there aren't a ton of people that donate. It can be difficult. There are strict habits that need to be maintained. Not only do you have to pass the screening process (phone interview and questionnaire packet complete with forms to be signed by your OB as well as the baby's pediatrician) and blood work (which thankfully, they pay for); but you also have to adhere to strict rules about certain foods (or food components) to avoid - like large amounts of caffeine - medications or herbs you need to avoid (which is basically all of them with the exception of multi-vitamins or prenatals), and practices with how exactly you need to pump,what containers to use, and how to maintain your pump parts and collection bottles. It's a lot to remember and takes dedication. I still think it's worth it.
For the milk bank I'm working with, the initial donation is 100 oz. which is just under a gallon. After your initial donation, you can donate as much and as often as you like before your baby is a year old. Because the milk is primarily given to babies in the NICU, the nutritional components of your milk have to be closer to what a young baby would need and since it changes as your baby grows, the nutritional composition of milk for a nursing toddler is completely different than that of an infant, so there is a cut off point.
While I was waiting for all my paperwork to clear so I could pick up bottles to use for collection, I actually started donating to a local mom that I know that was having supply issues. Practices like this are normally not recommended since when you "casually share" there is no health screenings and it is unknown what you could be passing along. Typically if you know and trust the donor, however, there is the potential of less risk. In any case, it was nice to be able to help that mom out as well as work on increasing my supply since I was planning on donating anyway. I've recently had my blood drawn and I am waiting for the ok to drop off the milk I've collected up to this point. I actually ran out of bottles because I no longer was pumping for the mom I know (she was able to get her supply back up - yay!) so I ended up filling up the bottles faster than I anticipated.
I really do strongly urge any nursing mom who has a well established supply to look into donating. There is such a high demand and since you will make more milk to meet the demand, you won't be starving your baby, you'll just be making extra. It may be a bit of a pain or inconvenience, but it is so needed. More babies can be helped and if there are enough people that are willing to donate, the likelihood of babies being helped beyond the NICU is higher. I think all babies should benefit from breast milk and if for whatever reason they can't get it from their mom, it should be easier to get it from the milk bank than it currently is. The only way for that to happen is to have more women take the time to donate. Here is the link to HMBANA to find the milk bank closest to you and see what you can do to help: http://www.hmbana.org/
Monday, July 4, 2011
On My Friend the Moby (A Review)
Ah, my Moby. It is truly a good friend...
Here is the story of my Moby. When my first son was about 8 months old, he was a hefty fellow. I had been using my HotSling which I loved dearly especially for quick trips in and out of the store, but because my son was so large, it really started to hurt my shoulder for extended periods of time or for longer (or even normal length) shopping trips. I wanted another baby-wearing option that would spread the weight across both of my shoulders. From the various carriers I had seen, a Moby looked like one I was really interested in. After a casual mention of it to my mother-in-law, she actually got me one. I think I had just told her I was looking at them and before I knew it, she sent one to me in the mail.
Now, the Moby does have a bit of a learning curve to it since it is a lot of fabric, but the versatility is amazing. If you are not familiar with a Moby, it is a type of baby carrier referred to as a stretchy wrap (wrap carriers can also be made of a woven fabric). It is made of about 6 yards of cotton jersey knit so it is soft and comfortable. There are no buckles or straps, nothing hard so it's all soft material against yours and your baby's body. There are several configurations for wrapping the carrier to hold your baby. The Moby comes with an instruction booklet that demonstrates several wraps, but the internet is also your friend for learning new ways to wrap and carry your baby.
Mobys are very popular for newborns, but like I said, I got mine when my oldest son was about 8 months old and I loved it. I carried him in the "hug hold" which is the traditional wrap that holds the baby against your body facing you. The baby is in a seated position with his/her legs spread in a "frog" fashion. It was wonderful. After a while though, it became a bit difficult for me to carry my little one because he wasn't so little and I'm a bit short for a larger kiddo to be carried on my front side. A friend taught me a side carry that she had created which was fantastic and held the baby on my hip similar to the sling, but the weight of the child was carried on my waist rather than my shoulder. The only drawback to this carry is that you do have to hold the baby while you wrap it but it's very comfortable, very secure, and it still lets you carry the kiddo hands free. I also discovered a carry called the "double hammock" which is a back carry for a wrap. Traditionally, it is not recommended to use a stretchy wrap for a back carry, but I found that I was able to wrap the Moby tightly enough to hold my son securely and he loved it.
Now that I have an infant, the Moby is again proving to be well worth every penny that was paid for it. I wear it almost every day. With a baby and a two year old, it's invaluable. I can wear the baby in the newborn hold (which is like the hug hold except his legs are tucked in) and he is tight and close to me leaving me hands free to chase the toddler and still feel confident that the baby is safe and secure. He loves it and sleeps well in it. The Moby allows me to go grocery shopping where I place the toddler in the shopping cart and the baby in the Moby. I also take trips to the mall with a friend of mine wearing the baby in the Moby and my toddler rides in the stroller. I frequently take my toddler on wagon rides carrying my baby in the Moby. It's no fuss and hands free. I recently even learned a nursing wrap configuration (thank you, YouTube) where I can nurse the baby completely hands-free (although, this configuration does require you to hold the baby while you wrap it).
My Moby came with wrap instructions for the newborn hold, the hug hold, the kangaroo hold, a sling style hip hold, and a nursing hold (not hands-free). From what I've seen, the sling style hip hold and nursing hold are no longer included in the instructions, which is just as well, I didn't use them anyway. Well, I did use the nursing hold a couple of times but found it undesirable because it was not hands-free.
The Moby seems intimidating, but it really is a wonderful carrier that can be used from infancy to toddler-hood once you get the various wraps down and find the ones you like. The versatility is unmatched in any other style carrier I've seen. The biggest complaints I've heard about the Moby is the sheer amount of fabric which seems like a lot but it does allow for almost everyone to be able to wear it and the heat factor during the warmer months. I still wear mine in the south Texas heat, and yes, it's hot, but I would rather wear it than have the baby in the bucket carrier part of the car seat and I try to avoid going out during the hottest part of the day. Almost every day I'm out and about wearing my baby in my Moby I get comments on it. I've had many people ask where they can get one and others comment about how clever it is that something like the Moby is available (although some people think the baby is in my shirt since it's made from the same type of material as t-shirts are and it covers the greater portion of my upper body). I, of course, rave about how wonderful it is, because I probably would be at the end of my rope without it!
Here is the story of my Moby. When my first son was about 8 months old, he was a hefty fellow. I had been using my HotSling which I loved dearly especially for quick trips in and out of the store, but because my son was so large, it really started to hurt my shoulder for extended periods of time or for longer (or even normal length) shopping trips. I wanted another baby-wearing option that would spread the weight across both of my shoulders. From the various carriers I had seen, a Moby looked like one I was really interested in. After a casual mention of it to my mother-in-law, she actually got me one. I think I had just told her I was looking at them and before I knew it, she sent one to me in the mail.
Now, the Moby does have a bit of a learning curve to it since it is a lot of fabric, but the versatility is amazing. If you are not familiar with a Moby, it is a type of baby carrier referred to as a stretchy wrap (wrap carriers can also be made of a woven fabric). It is made of about 6 yards of cotton jersey knit so it is soft and comfortable. There are no buckles or straps, nothing hard so it's all soft material against yours and your baby's body. There are several configurations for wrapping the carrier to hold your baby. The Moby comes with an instruction booklet that demonstrates several wraps, but the internet is also your friend for learning new ways to wrap and carry your baby.
Mobys are very popular for newborns, but like I said, I got mine when my oldest son was about 8 months old and I loved it. I carried him in the "hug hold" which is the traditional wrap that holds the baby against your body facing you. The baby is in a seated position with his/her legs spread in a "frog" fashion. It was wonderful. After a while though, it became a bit difficult for me to carry my little one because he wasn't so little and I'm a bit short for a larger kiddo to be carried on my front side. A friend taught me a side carry that she had created which was fantastic and held the baby on my hip similar to the sling, but the weight of the child was carried on my waist rather than my shoulder. The only drawback to this carry is that you do have to hold the baby while you wrap it but it's very comfortable, very secure, and it still lets you carry the kiddo hands free. I also discovered a carry called the "double hammock" which is a back carry for a wrap. Traditionally, it is not recommended to use a stretchy wrap for a back carry, but I found that I was able to wrap the Moby tightly enough to hold my son securely and he loved it.
Now that I have an infant, the Moby is again proving to be well worth every penny that was paid for it. I wear it almost every day. With a baby and a two year old, it's invaluable. I can wear the baby in the newborn hold (which is like the hug hold except his legs are tucked in) and he is tight and close to me leaving me hands free to chase the toddler and still feel confident that the baby is safe and secure. He loves it and sleeps well in it. The Moby allows me to go grocery shopping where I place the toddler in the shopping cart and the baby in the Moby. I also take trips to the mall with a friend of mine wearing the baby in the Moby and my toddler rides in the stroller. I frequently take my toddler on wagon rides carrying my baby in the Moby. It's no fuss and hands free. I recently even learned a nursing wrap configuration (thank you, YouTube) where I can nurse the baby completely hands-free (although, this configuration does require you to hold the baby while you wrap it).My Moby came with wrap instructions for the newborn hold, the hug hold, the kangaroo hold, a sling style hip hold, and a nursing hold (not hands-free). From what I've seen, the sling style hip hold and nursing hold are no longer included in the instructions, which is just as well, I didn't use them anyway. Well, I did use the nursing hold a couple of times but found it undesirable because it was not hands-free.
The Moby seems intimidating, but it really is a wonderful carrier that can be used from infancy to toddler-hood once you get the various wraps down and find the ones you like. The versatility is unmatched in any other style carrier I've seen. The biggest complaints I've heard about the Moby is the sheer amount of fabric which seems like a lot but it does allow for almost everyone to be able to wear it and the heat factor during the warmer months. I still wear mine in the south Texas heat, and yes, it's hot, but I would rather wear it than have the baby in the bucket carrier part of the car seat and I try to avoid going out during the hottest part of the day. Almost every day I'm out and about wearing my baby in my Moby I get comments on it. I've had many people ask where they can get one and others comment about how clever it is that something like the Moby is available (although some people think the baby is in my shirt since it's made from the same type of material as t-shirts are and it covers the greater portion of my upper body). I, of course, rave about how wonderful it is, because I probably would be at the end of my rope without it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)